Friday, April 22, 2011
Don't sweat the small stuff, pray about everything!
April showers, April fools, time stands still for no one! For me, this last month has been one of questions, and a few answers. Yes, we are definitely going to China. And I still don't really know why. Sometimes, that bothers me. In my heart, I know why. But, I don't know how! It's amazing how much that bothers me. I'm more of a control freak than I realized. I turn my days over to God on a daily basis. I'm fine following where He leads, here, in Conway. I usually don't know what the day will deliver and I thank God that He is in control. So what's the big deal about being in a different place. First, I do alot of choosing what to turn over to God, and what isn't necessary. I know if I want bacon and eggs or yogurt or nothing for breakfast. I don't even know what I'll be eating in China. This is a step of faith. But this is the small stuff..God has not led me to this decision based on breakfast. I'm going because eternity is closer than we think, and there is work to do. God's work is people. He loves all people, which most of us know. And he has placed a special love for these people whom I don't even know in my heart. How is that possible. I don't know. I seem to be saying that alot these days. And God just says "trust me". Whom better to trust. And of course, trust has been an issue of mine since the beginning of time. I trust God knows what He is doing, because I truly don't know. What I do know is that it will be good if God is in it. It will also be bring forth good results or good fruit, if God has control of it. And it will stand the test of time, it will not be shaken if it is build on truth. Maybe, one soul stands in the balance of our obedience to Him. I know God would move heaven and earth to save even one of his creations. Pray for us, if you are reading this, that we don't miss the moment to do what He has called us to do. Pray that we are wise enough and bold enough to speak only words of Truth.
Sunday, March 27, 2011
JUST A DREAM
There was a time when God spoke to me in a dream.
One of those dreams that are so real, it's hard to believe you are not living it.
In this dream I was in the boat with many others and it was a dark night with waves crashing.
I saw Jesus walking on the water and he held out his arms, for us to come to Him.
I looked in His face, or more accurately, I looked into His eyes.
And, what I experienced , is hard to put into words.
The Light coming out of His eyes was total power, Holy love.
Just grazing into that light, I had no doubts, He filled me with love, erasing every fearful thought or doubt I had ever experienced.
I remember thinking, He will hold us up, that power will keep anything from harming us.
I remember thinking Peter don't you feel it, don't you know, we can walk on water too.
He will bring us to Him. Then in my eagerness to go out on the water to Jesus, I put my hands on the rail to step over the side of the boat and looked down to see where to place my feet.
I looked down and froze in total fear.
I knew Jesus was still there, but I could only see the deep, dark waves.
I was paralyzed with fear. I couldn't move at all.
Just a moment before, I had been feeling a bit superior.
I knew and for a moment saw Jesus, and in that moment I had no understanding of anyone hesitating or doubting.
I had no empathy at all.
I had been blessed and failed to share that blessing.
You can only keep what you are willing to give away.
I wanted to be closer to Jesus. I acted as though it was me who was responsible for that love, that power that was going to perform miracles.
I wasn't concerned about anyone else in the boat.
Just one second with my eyes off Jesus, and I couldn't move.
One of those dreams that are so real, it's hard to believe you are not living it.
In this dream I was in the boat with many others and it was a dark night with waves crashing.
I saw Jesus walking on the water and he held out his arms, for us to come to Him.
I looked in His face, or more accurately, I looked into His eyes.
And, what I experienced , is hard to put into words.
The Light coming out of His eyes was total power, Holy love.
Just grazing into that light, I had no doubts, He filled me with love, erasing every fearful thought or doubt I had ever experienced.
I remember thinking, He will hold us up, that power will keep anything from harming us.
I remember thinking Peter don't you feel it, don't you know, we can walk on water too.
He will bring us to Him. Then in my eagerness to go out on the water to Jesus, I put my hands on the rail to step over the side of the boat and looked down to see where to place my feet.
I looked down and froze in total fear.
I knew Jesus was still there, but I could only see the deep, dark waves.
I was paralyzed with fear. I couldn't move at all.
Just a moment before, I had been feeling a bit superior.
I knew and for a moment saw Jesus, and in that moment I had no understanding of anyone hesitating or doubting.
I had no empathy at all.
I had been blessed and failed to share that blessing.
You can only keep what you are willing to give away.
I wanted to be closer to Jesus. I acted as though it was me who was responsible for that love, that power that was going to perform miracles.
I wasn't concerned about anyone else in the boat.
Just one second with my eyes off Jesus, and I couldn't move.
Saturday, March 12, 2011
MORE ABOUT GOD AND MEETING JESUS
Just one more simple story of a simple woman that God loved.
Yes, I believe He chooses us long before we choose Him.
He loved me even when I was quite unlovable.
When I was a timid, scared little girl; He loved me.
When I was an angry, and resentful teenager; He still loved me.
When I no longer believed he existed; He still loved me.
When I didn't love myself, and when it wasn't easy
for others to love me, He never stopped loving me.
I thought I was in control of my life, making all my own decisions,
trusting only a few select people. I was quick to judge others when I had not walked in thier shoes.
I was full of pride, full of myself really. Not a very pretty picture. I was glad not to be like others, in my mind they were what we used to call " goody 2 shoes". Another way of saying anyone serving God appeared to be a hypocrite in my judgemental eyes. Even those helping me, I could find faults in them. God in his mercy never stopped calling me. And finally when I ran into somthing I couldn't control it began to turn me to Him.
Just a little background on me. I quit school the first time, when I was 13y/o. Of course, that is not legal, so I lied and said I was 16y/o. Now it's legal. I actually started adult education classes at night while I worked during the day. Thought I was so smart, taking a short cut. Today, with computers I doubt that would be possible. But for a time, I was a waitress, not a good one, but I waited tables. My first job. My next job was helping out in my grandmother's Donut Shop. Ate all the donuts I wanted and wieghed less than 100lbs. Who says donuts are fattening? Just ain't so!
Anyway, the next thing I know I'm 16y/o and getting married. Again, I lied and said I was 18 y/o.
Being a wife and a mother was my only dream back then. Well, becoming a wife was alot easier than becoming a mother. My heart was broken, when year after year I was unable to concieve or carry a baby. We attempted to adopt. Again we met with failure, we were the youngest couple to ever apply for adoption in NH. When there were so many unwanted, uncared for children, it just wasn't fair.
Well, after 7 yrs. and many disappointments my son was born. My first miracle, to be followed a few yrs later by a second miracle, my daughter. I have never been closer to God, or more grateful than when I first realized God really did love me. He blessed me with these children. And as much as I loved my children, God loved me more. God is love. He began to heal me. I publicly gave my heart and my life to God when I accepted His son, Jesus. I was baptized as a young mother and began a walk with Jesus. Sad to say, but I have not always been an obedient child of God, any more than I was an obedient child in this world. But, I can tell anyone, God can only bless you when you are walking in faith and obedience. Nothing can ever take the place of God's blessings. This simple woman's story is still being written. At this point in my life, I am seeking more of God. He is the author of my faith. I am grateful for all the undeserved blessings, but I am more grateful that He is able to love the unloveable, including me.
Yes, I believe He chooses us long before we choose Him.
He loved me even when I was quite unlovable.
When I was a timid, scared little girl; He loved me.
When I was an angry, and resentful teenager; He still loved me.
When I no longer believed he existed; He still loved me.
When I didn't love myself, and when it wasn't easy
for others to love me, He never stopped loving me.
I thought I was in control of my life, making all my own decisions,
trusting only a few select people. I was quick to judge others when I had not walked in thier shoes.
I was full of pride, full of myself really. Not a very pretty picture. I was glad not to be like others, in my mind they were what we used to call " goody 2 shoes". Another way of saying anyone serving God appeared to be a hypocrite in my judgemental eyes. Even those helping me, I could find faults in them. God in his mercy never stopped calling me. And finally when I ran into somthing I couldn't control it began to turn me to Him.
Just a little background on me. I quit school the first time, when I was 13y/o. Of course, that is not legal, so I lied and said I was 16y/o. Now it's legal. I actually started adult education classes at night while I worked during the day. Thought I was so smart, taking a short cut. Today, with computers I doubt that would be possible. But for a time, I was a waitress, not a good one, but I waited tables. My first job. My next job was helping out in my grandmother's Donut Shop. Ate all the donuts I wanted and wieghed less than 100lbs. Who says donuts are fattening? Just ain't so!
Anyway, the next thing I know I'm 16y/o and getting married. Again, I lied and said I was 18 y/o.
Being a wife and a mother was my only dream back then. Well, becoming a wife was alot easier than becoming a mother. My heart was broken, when year after year I was unable to concieve or carry a baby. We attempted to adopt. Again we met with failure, we were the youngest couple to ever apply for adoption in NH. When there were so many unwanted, uncared for children, it just wasn't fair.
Well, after 7 yrs. and many disappointments my son was born. My first miracle, to be followed a few yrs later by a second miracle, my daughter. I have never been closer to God, or more grateful than when I first realized God really did love me. He blessed me with these children. And as much as I loved my children, God loved me more. God is love. He began to heal me. I publicly gave my heart and my life to God when I accepted His son, Jesus. I was baptized as a young mother and began a walk with Jesus. Sad to say, but I have not always been an obedient child of God, any more than I was an obedient child in this world. But, I can tell anyone, God can only bless you when you are walking in faith and obedience. Nothing can ever take the place of God's blessings. This simple woman's story is still being written. At this point in my life, I am seeking more of God. He is the author of my faith. I am grateful for all the undeserved blessings, but I am more grateful that He is able to love the unloveable, including me.
Thursday, March 10, 2011
All is well
Dave is doing well, just being fine tuned for the trip. No blockage, no new stints, no fears.
Just routine maintenance, cardiologist appt. next wk for echo and ekg.
And for me, it's back to work. And passport picture today, and turn it in.
Just routine maintenance, cardiologist appt. next wk for echo and ekg.
And for me, it's back to work. And passport picture today, and turn it in.
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Sunday, March 6, 2011
smalll steps today
Going to China!
The world we live in would mostly likely say, are they crazy?
Who do they think they are?
What makes them think they are needed?
God says, He makes foolish the wisdom of the world.
His Holy Word says, trust Him. Lean not unto your own understanding
but acknowledge Him in all that you do.
He chooses the simple things of the world to confuse the wise.
God knows we are simple. He knows every hair on our heads.
How can he not know of our needs? His promises are still true today.
I promised myself to share the stumbles as well as the steps
we take during the next few wks. Our plan is to go to China in July of this yr.
If it is really God's plan, it will happen. The true point of a short mission trip is change.
Changes in our hearts. If we are open to the Holy Spirit, we can trust where He is leading us.
Of course, I have been led places before that I would never have agreed to go.
Places called failures. But, even there, God has been teaching me. I am His masterpiece, how awesome is that? Beyond my imagination, that He loves me that much, to spend so much time correcting and improving me. I am definitely a work in progress, but I know the end result.
Thus far, I'm amazed at all the details to complete and how fast the wks are passing.
I don't want to forget to share how blessed we have been financially. I tend to trust God easier with my money than with my pride. It's still a daily battle not to give in to prideful thinking.
But back to blessing. God is so good. One of the first steps of a mission trip , after making a decision, is to make a deposit of money for the trip. Because both Dave and I want to go, our deposit was $500.00. If you live in Conway, Ar., you may remember that recently all Faulkner County employees received a one time check for $500. That was announced just days after we paid our deposit. Oh, it may make more sense if you know I work for the Faulkner County Sheriff's Office. We didn't have clue that was coming! Thank you Lord.
On the side of stumbles, my greatest fears are being tested. The love of my life, my soul-mate has been doing quite well for the last few yrs. Last wk out of the blue, he is being sent for a renal arteriogram. My first reaction was not faith, but Lord I can't face this again. God has spared Dave's life more than once. Dave is still doing quite well, this is just to check for possible blockage and stint if necessary. His B/P as been up a little . He is being fine tuned for our trip. God does not give us a spirit of fear, and I refuse to stay there.
My computer bit the dust. The file with all our pictures, on Dave's laptop, is not opening for anything at this point. So it's impossible for me to give you pictures today. They will come in the future.
I have an appt for my vaccinations. Dave has already taken his. I have my passport application filled out, but I need pictures taken before I send it in. Dave has already sent his. And he's the real procrastinator in our family. He's usually the pro at procrastination.
On the positive side, I have started a blog! May this encourage others to step out, if grandma and gramps can do missions, so can you. With love I can reassure you, God never ask you to go without providing a way.
The world we live in would mostly likely say, are they crazy?
Who do they think they are?
What makes them think they are needed?
God says, He makes foolish the wisdom of the world.
His Holy Word says, trust Him. Lean not unto your own understanding
but acknowledge Him in all that you do.
He chooses the simple things of the world to confuse the wise.
God knows we are simple. He knows every hair on our heads.
How can he not know of our needs? His promises are still true today.
I promised myself to share the stumbles as well as the steps
we take during the next few wks. Our plan is to go to China in July of this yr.
If it is really God's plan, it will happen. The true point of a short mission trip is change.
Changes in our hearts. If we are open to the Holy Spirit, we can trust where He is leading us.
Of course, I have been led places before that I would never have agreed to go.
Places called failures. But, even there, God has been teaching me. I am His masterpiece, how awesome is that? Beyond my imagination, that He loves me that much, to spend so much time correcting and improving me. I am definitely a work in progress, but I know the end result.
Thus far, I'm amazed at all the details to complete and how fast the wks are passing.
I don't want to forget to share how blessed we have been financially. I tend to trust God easier with my money than with my pride. It's still a daily battle not to give in to prideful thinking.
But back to blessing. God is so good. One of the first steps of a mission trip , after making a decision, is to make a deposit of money for the trip. Because both Dave and I want to go, our deposit was $500.00. If you live in Conway, Ar., you may remember that recently all Faulkner County employees received a one time check for $500. That was announced just days after we paid our deposit. Oh, it may make more sense if you know I work for the Faulkner County Sheriff's Office. We didn't have clue that was coming! Thank you Lord.
On the side of stumbles, my greatest fears are being tested. The love of my life, my soul-mate has been doing quite well for the last few yrs. Last wk out of the blue, he is being sent for a renal arteriogram. My first reaction was not faith, but Lord I can't face this again. God has spared Dave's life more than once. Dave is still doing quite well, this is just to check for possible blockage and stint if necessary. His B/P as been up a little . He is being fine tuned for our trip. God does not give us a spirit of fear, and I refuse to stay there.
My computer bit the dust. The file with all our pictures, on Dave's laptop, is not opening for anything at this point. So it's impossible for me to give you pictures today. They will come in the future.
I have an appt for my vaccinations. Dave has already taken his. I have my passport application filled out, but I need pictures taken before I send it in. Dave has already sent his. And he's the real procrastinator in our family. He's usually the pro at procrastination.
On the positive side, I have started a blog! May this encourage others to step out, if grandma and gramps can do missions, so can you. With love I can reassure you, God never ask you to go without providing a way.
poem by DaVant
HEAVENLY FATHER;
Today, in this place, we pray that we can bring a light
to someone's eye, and a smile to someone's face.
Today, here, in this place, we ask the Holy Spirit to
reveal the Master's steps for us to retrace.
In Jesus name we pray,
AMEN
Today, in this place, we pray that we can bring a light
to someone's eye, and a smile to someone's face.
Today, here, in this place, we ask the Holy Spirit to
reveal the Master's steps for us to retrace.
In Jesus name we pray,
AMEN
DAVE
My hubby has a name, Dave. He would prefer not being referred to as hubby. And by the way, his age is 74. How times flies.
But this blog is more about what God is doing than the mistakes I make. I think.
Donations are never required to follow our progress. It's simply God speaking to me about pride. I hope that not only Dave and I have this experience, but many of you who may not have thought about going begin to consider the possibilities. Only when we do what we know to do, can God bless us! I am quite greedy about God's blessings.....
Pictures and details to follow. When I learn to use Dave's computor or I gain some memory in mine, I will share pictures. As soon as I completed my first blog, my computor quit ( memory died, I knew it was going but what timing) .
I still want to share my testimony, as well as how God gave us back our deposit for this trip.
But this blog is more about what God is doing than the mistakes I make. I think.
Donations are never required to follow our progress. It's simply God speaking to me about pride. I hope that not only Dave and I have this experience, but many of you who may not have thought about going begin to consider the possibilities. Only when we do what we know to do, can God bless us! I am quite greedy about God's blessings.....
Pictures and details to follow. When I learn to use Dave's computor or I gain some memory in mine, I will share pictures. As soon as I completed my first blog, my computor quit ( memory died, I knew it was going but what timing) .
I still want to share my testimony, as well as how God gave us back our deposit for this trip.
Saturday, March 5, 2011
Conway to China
SMALL STEPS OF FAITH, WHERE WILL THEY LEAD?
Only God knows!
We, my hubby and I, are on a journey towards eternity. By the way, so are you.
As my granny used to say, "God willing and the creek don't rise" we are headed to China
on a mission trip. How on earth did this happen? You see, Dave and I, are most unlikely to be called saints by anyone other than God. We are probably the very least in the family of God.The world would say we live a simple live and they would be right on target. We are simple people, living a simple life, sooooooooooo how did this start? It's simple, small steps of faith....in a great big God.
Some may say we are starting to cram for the final exam, before eternity. And they may be right. I have no doubt we will pass the exam on judgement day. Not because of anything we have ever done, or ever could do, but because of what Christ did for us. But, I am concerned about those bonus points. Have I done all I can do to bring others to heaven with me? The simple truth is No I haven't. As my granny never said," we all have excuses, ...".
WHY GO ???
#1-God commands us to go. Matt.28:19
#2- Our pastor suggest everyone go on a mission trip at least once.
#3-Our hearts desire is to go.( My secret dream is to hear Jesus say "Well done, good and faithful servant")
WHY CHINA???
#1- It's available to us. We have confidence in the leaders of our church. One of our pastors is leading the group. Sounds safe, that's simple.
#2-We are able physically to accomplish this trip. The simple truth is, it will be a challenge physically for my hubby. But, he really wants to go and is working hard to accomplish this goal..You see, he is 72y/o and has multiple serious chronic health problems. I on the other hand, am just a spring chick @ 62 y/o and occasionally whine very loudly about my back pain. God forgive me, but I do whine!
#3-We admire the Asian culture. Hey, they respect age! It's a positive bias, thank you very much!
WILL WE SUCCESS? ONLY GOD KNOWS!
We invite you to follow our journey from Conway to China. We will share the steps we take along the way as we simply try to obey. You are also invited to join our support team. Details to follow.
Only God knows!
We, my hubby and I, are on a journey towards eternity. By the way, so are you.
As my granny used to say, "God willing and the creek don't rise" we are headed to China
on a mission trip. How on earth did this happen? You see, Dave and I, are most unlikely to be called saints by anyone other than God. We are probably the very least in the family of God.The world would say we live a simple live and they would be right on target. We are simple people, living a simple life, sooooooooooo how did this start? It's simple, small steps of faith....in a great big God.
Some may say we are starting to cram for the final exam, before eternity. And they may be right. I have no doubt we will pass the exam on judgement day. Not because of anything we have ever done, or ever could do, but because of what Christ did for us. But, I am concerned about those bonus points. Have I done all I can do to bring others to heaven with me? The simple truth is No I haven't. As my granny never said," we all have excuses, ...".
WHY GO ???
#1-God commands us to go. Matt.28:19
#2- Our pastor suggest everyone go on a mission trip at least once.
#3-Our hearts desire is to go.( My secret dream is to hear Jesus say "Well done, good and faithful servant")
WHY CHINA???
#1- It's available to us. We have confidence in the leaders of our church. One of our pastors is leading the group. Sounds safe, that's simple.
#2-We are able physically to accomplish this trip. The simple truth is, it will be a challenge physically for my hubby. But, he really wants to go and is working hard to accomplish this goal..You see, he is 72y/o and has multiple serious chronic health problems. I on the other hand, am just a spring chick @ 62 y/o and occasionally whine very loudly about my back pain. God forgive me, but I do whine!
#3-We admire the Asian culture. Hey, they respect age! It's a positive bias, thank you very much!
WILL WE SUCCESS? ONLY GOD KNOWS!
We invite you to follow our journey from Conway to China. We will share the steps we take along the way as we simply try to obey. You are also invited to join our support team. Details to follow.
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